"Audrey was asking me about how I potty trained her. She said "when I was tiny did you put me on the potty and I was so small I almost feel in?" I said "you were tiny but I didn't let you fall in." She said "did you put me on your lap and I peed between your legs?" Ummm No...gross"

"I was running an errand with Audrey in tow. She was very slowly getting out of the car so I said "Audrey come on move faster please." She says "geez mom why are you being so garelic ?" I said "what does garelic mean?" She says " I don't know what it means but if someone asks me I'll tell them it's the way you are acting right now." I keep thinking I am in this to win the war not the small battles.....but WOW!"

"There is thunder, lightening, and a few drops of rain. Audrey has decided to play outside. She is wearing a miss matched "bokini", Olivia's woman's size 9 rain boots, and has Ben's froggy umbrella from kindergarten......"

September 24, 2011

Arriving at Ben's flag football game Audrey says "Aw man I forgot my money." I said "Money? what do you need that for?" She says "to buy stuff" I said "there isn't anything to buy here" she says "yeah there is.....mouth guards!"

September 18, 2011

Just painted Audrey's nails. 30 seconds later she says to me "mom can you get the boogers out of my nose, my nails are wet?" I said "let me get a tissue." She said "tissue won't work this needs picking." shaking my head in disbelief.

September 15, 2011

Made a yummy dinner tonight. Audrey wasn't that psyched about it. She said " the rice taste-is like crap". Nice!

Septmeber 14, 2011

 Audrey doing her "work" called "vegatation"


https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=10150411337338646&l=506789626987725741

September 11, 2011

Audrey was having some privacy in the bathroom. Ben and Olivia chasing each other through the house, bust into the bathroom where she is. Audrey yells "Hey just give me a moment will ya, geez people." Big kids not listening to her. She continues with..."A moment people, just one moment that's all I'm asking for."

September 8, 2011

Telling Audrey a story she interrupts me and says "mom mom mom this is making my brain plumicate." I said what does that mean? she says "it means my brain wants to explode into a million billion pieces." Thinking to myself I feel that way often.

September 7, 2011

Audrey asks "mom when I was in your belly what kinds of things did I do?" I said slept and wiggled. She said "did I like just doing that?" I said yes you did. She says "do you think I could go in there again so I can remember liking it?" uh, no!

September 2, 2011

Talking tonight at dinner about babies being born. Olivia mentioned that "daddy actually delivered Audrey." Audrey says to me "you mean babies are delivered like in a box?" then a little later she is seeing a picture of herself immediately after she was born. Seeing the tie off for the umbilical cord asks "was that my penis?"

September 1, 2011

Audrey and I are "discussing" what she can wear to school, we aren't agreeing. She sits down on the floor in her closet and says "mom I think we have a problem that needs to be solved." I'm thinking, wear what I tell you....problem solved.