Audrey is messing around at dinner and not eating. I said " come on get eating faster please." she said " I have little teeth and a small mouth that's why I can't chew fast!

Audrey loves kindergarten! She says "mom I don't know why they call it kindergarten there's no garden. I've decided to rename it kinder class.... I don't really know what kinder means but it works.

Ben was teasing Audrey. Audrey looks at me and says "can you please put him back in your belly, then back in your mind, and try again to make a better one?!?!

Audrey being.....well, Audrey. I'm speechless really."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oKYvVqtmTKY

Audrey says "Mom can I get another game on my iPad?" I said "Audrey you have 250 of them you don't need another one." She says "Mom I pwned them so bah-bam I need another one." Yes, my 5 year old used pwned and bah-bam in a sentence!!!

Playing the cranium game balloon lagoon with Audrey. I am trying to flip little green frogs into a container and finish before the music ends. She is giving me advice the whole time. I say "thanks". She says "no mom you're supposed to say 'tanks for da tip'. Trying to sound like Arnold

While shopping with my girls they were asking for a lot of things. I said yes to something they both wanted and certainly weren't expecting me to say yes. Immediately after Audrey was asking for something else and Olivia said "Audrey don't push the envelope mom already said yes." Audrey says " Liv what envelope are you talking about?

"Audrey let us all know on our way to dinner last night that she can lick her armpit. There was a collective "eww" in the car.

"While putting Audrey to bed tonight she said "I can't go to sleep I am to afraid." I said "what are you afraid of?" She says "Oh I can't say, that would be bad, at least one of us should sleep tonight.

Apparently in the middle of brushing her teeth her nails needed to be done!!

"Audrey is playing with a musical instrument app on her iPad. She starts playing the organ and says "oh that sounds terrible, it's going to make me pass out, someone make it stop fast!!

Ben yells across the house "Mom Audrey just said I was a pain in THE ass!" As I am walking to where they are, Audrey yells "NOOO....I said he was being a pain in MY ass!" Great and by great I mean not great.