"I ask Audrey "How was your day?" She says "Mom it was a total bust...I mean a real bust!" I said "What does that mean?" She says "It was busted apart when I could find my library book....but it's Friday so I'm over it!

While in the shower with cleanser all over my face I ask Audrey if she would grab me a wash cloth. She does. I proceed to washing it off. She says "Mom the wash cloth is mostly clean, I only used it to wash my butt, but the rest of it is clean." Said like it was somehow a consolation prize!

Audrey calls her middle finger "strong man". I know she doesn't know what exactly it means if you hold it up, but I know that her brother and sister have told her its bad. Tonight she says " mom if you don't let me squirt whipped cream in my mouth I'm going to show you my strong man!

Audrey says in the car "Mom have you ever swallowed something and it feels like it's landed in your boob or breast or nipplit? Cause it hurts!

"So Audrey says to me " this boy in my class won't be my friend and when I asked why he said because he isn't friends with girls and I said to him 'Dude I know you're friends with 2 girls in our class don't fib at me.

Audrey just walked into my room and said "hi mom, I'm going to go powder my nose which is girl talk for go to the bathroom." Insert flushing here. Then she says "okay I'm all done powdering my nose." She used air quotes for last part

Audrey asked me if I would give her a mani pedi today after school. She said "mom but don't forget the overcoating!" I asked what that was. She said "it's when you polish everything one time then do it again." Who knew a second coat was an overcoating?

While taking Audrey to school in the morning I noticed she was staring out the window and not talking. I asked her what she was thinking about. Her reply " oh I have stuff rattling around in my brain and I can play it like a show and watch everyone doing their part." explains a lot!

While waiting to pick Olivia up fr school Audrey puts the DVD headphones on and says "last night I snuck into Olivia's room and put a GPS thingy into her head and I can tell you when she is walking to the car cause I get a beep beep beep signal.

So the other night while putting Audrey to bed she says to me "when someone sneezes you say bless you, right?" I say "yes" she says "what do you say when someone coughs?" I say "nothing" she says " that's not right I think we should say blessness..... You. Yeah that's it blessness you." I said "okay!" a few minutes pass and she says "mom do you need to cough?